Let me share a lovely movie I watched the other afternoon
- Band Baja Baraat
I
got attracted to Band Baja Baraat by Mr. Habib Faisal. One night, surfing cable
channels I chanced upon an unknown film where Hrishi Kapoor, all plump and
pink, was trying to convince Neetu Singh with that old twinkle in her eyes that
a scooter was the best urban transport in Delhi and a car was a liability. But she needed a car so that her sister in
law could show off to her in-laws. And
the children, a teen age boy and a college going girl did their rebellious bits
to convince poor old dad. But dad Hrishi Kapoor was a maths teacher and he found
out instead the high probability of winning a car by scratching cards in a 1000 packets of detergents.
I had to keep watching this lovely family’s story very late into the night. The
ad breaks didn’t reveal the name of the film and I dreaded that it might not
even at the end and Mr Google would throw up endless possibilities of what the
film could be. The end credits were in real small print you could not read so I
gave up all hope. And then God smiled. At the very end when you see logos of
the companies before the screen turns completely dark, there was the name of
the film “Do
Doonie Char”.
But more on that movie on another day.
- Band Baja Baraat
I
got attracted to Band Baja Baraat by Mr. Habib Faisal. One night, surfing cable
channels I chanced upon an unknown film where Hrishi Kapoor, all plump and
pink, was trying to convince Neetu Singh with that old twinkle in her eyes that
a scooter was the best urban transport in Delhi and a car was a liability. But she needed a car so that her sister in
law could show off to her in-laws. And
the children, a teen age boy and a college going girl did their rebellious bits
to convince poor old dad. But dad Hrishi Kapoor was a maths teacher and he found
out instead the high probability of winning a car by scratching cards in a 1000 packets of detergents.
I had to keep watching this lovely family’s story very late into the night. The
ad breaks didn’t reveal the name of the film and I dreaded that it might not
even at the end and Mr Google would throw up endless possibilities of what the
film could be. The end credits were in real small print you could not read so I
gave up all hope. And then God smiled. At the very end when you see logos of
the companies before the screen turns completely dark, there was the name of
the film “Do
Doonie Char”.But more on that movie on another day.
I thanked God and went to Mr Google the next morning. True to his fame, he
gave me megabytes of info on the movie. I was interested in the Director. He
was the writer as well, Mr Habib Faisal. I searched what else he did and came
up with Ishaqzaade
and Band Baja Baraat among other movies. I found out that Band Baja Baraat had a
bonus in Anushka
Sharma whom I had been ogling a lot in those internet ads. So one
afternoon I settled down to watch the film.
Ranvir Singh’s Bittoo is a
lovable college brat trying his hand at anything to stop his dad from taking
him back to their sugarcane farm. Anushka’s Shruti Kakkar is a lively college
girl planning her business career to become the best wedding planner on the
planet. Her doting parents allow her to realize her dream in 5 years and she
promises to settle down with their chosen groom. Bittoo crashes into Shruti at
a wedding supervised by her and finds another good reason not to go back to his
sugarcane fields.
The boy is
smart. The girl is smarter. . The boy speaks dehati English fluently. The girl
is all public schoollingo. The boy will do anything for her. The girl will not
cheat. Their one to one when Bittoo tries to impress Shruti to let him join her
business makes me smile and wipe my eyes at the same time and for the same
reason. I leave it to you to watch the film and find out the reason for yourself.
I quote a few lines from the scene.
Bittoo : Main kya soch raha tha mere pas bhi ek bahut bariya
binness idea hai, par thoda complicated hai. Pahle yeh karo phir woh , phir
woh… soch raha tha meri idea jab tak line pe nehi ata … chal main tere sath
Shadi Mubarak mein partnership kar leta hoon!
Shruti : Partnership ke complication me nehi parna!
Bittoo : Par itna bara business, 50 lakh ka turnover, akele
kaise samhalegi?
Shruti : Itni sari shadiya akele samhali hai!
Bittoo : Mere paas koi business idea nehi hai yaar!
Shruti : Maloom hai!
Bittoo : Are yaar
agar mai yaha rahke koi kam dhanda nehi kiya na toh bauji pakarke ghar wapas le
jayenge aur sari life ganne katwange! Mujhe bacha le please! Partner bana le
na! please !
Shruti : Na!
Bittoo : Are ek se ek idea nikal aur bhag daur mujhpe chor
de! Are main rat bhar jagke teri DVD banake laya na! Friend hai tu meri!
Shruti : Aj friend bol raha hai, kal I love you bol dega1!
Mereko koi emotion sath me nehi chahiye! Business start karni hai bas! Aur business
ka first rule : jiske sath vyapar karo usse kabhi na pyar karo! Pyar aur vyapar
ki jodi kabhi na banti! Na! main to single hi best hoon !
Bittoo ; Tu kahan pahuch gayi! Promise mai kabhi friendship
ke age nahi barunga!
Shruti : Kya guarantee hai?
Bittoo : Le bread pakore ki kasam! Bas! Chal!
Shruti : Na!
Bittoo : Achha partner nahi to secretary ! Assistant? Chal
peon hi bana le! Achha meri bat to sun!
OMG! Walmart negotiating with a village farmer might be more
considerate! But then, women!
I caught that word first on Mona Singh in Kya Hua Tera Wada
and got floored. Then Shweta Tiwary did it in Parvarish with her ever so large
melting eyes and larger eyelashes and the floor vanished from under my feet.
Now Band Baja Baraat made a full wedding song around it with Anushka and Ranvir
belting it out in chaste Punjabi!
Hat le nigore, neem ke pakore, picha kiu na chore,
Ghume daye baye
Tujhko sudharu, juti mai utaru, sar pe de maru
Dhaye dhaye
Romeo bina permit ho gaya
Tu to awyvi awyvi loot gaya!
Straight sadak chaap lyrics and easy foot tapping tune. Add
Anushka and Ranvir to it and you should have a new national wedding song from
Jharkhand to Amritsar.
Shruti and Bittoo’s binness Shaadi Mubarak, outperforms and
outshine all competition from Janakpuri to Chandigarh and graduate to managing a 5 star wedding. Celebrating it’s success
breaks Shruti’s business ka first rule. She falls in love with Bittoo. And like
most men, Bittoo can’t handle it.
He dreams that it will happen one day and when it does
happen, he feels guilty of breaking rules and betraying her trust.
Anushka marvels as Shruti sees Bittoo’s uneasiness and tries
to suppress her feelings to put him at ease. He is unable to control his
restlessness and erupts at anything and everything. Shruti reacts sharply.They
tear at each other, go separate ways and split the business between them with a
much calm as Cats
On a Hot Tin Roof.
By the way, did you watch this movie? It stars two of the
most beautiful people on earth, Elizabeth Taylor and Paul Newman. Watch it if
you haven’t. Watch it again if you have. I will share it with you someday.
Without each other for support, they make a mess of their
business till a five star client forces them to unite. And that they do in
style!
At the end Bittoo admits, mai gadha hoon. Tere bina kisi
cheez me mauj nehi hai, na ladkiya takneme, na chaye me na chowmein me!
Shruti commands, ab
business ko pura kar. Life me har cheez mere koi sikhani hai! And she proceeds
to teach.
Drop a line if you have watched the film, or when you do!
Bye till next time!
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